Free at last!

Ok... Dad left this morning... we left him at the train station at 8.40, his train had to leave at 9.03... actually he called me around 11.30 and was still in Firenze. Here the snow is stopping everything. Highway are somewhere closed, Milan airport closed, and people go crazy.. because snow is something that they can't control and have not many means to defend themself completely. So people get crazy. Moreover... Italy is running out of gas. Russia is cutting the supply of gas and the government asked to the Italians to drop of 1-2 C° the heater. Because here people have really high temperatures in their homes... so, that brings me directly to the last argument I had with my dad: the nuclear power. Italy has no nuclear power station after a public vote that decided so. But people like my dad do not agree... but I do and frictions leads to sparkles that lead to fire.... aarrgghhh...
By the way, the week finally ended and I hope I can get a little rest from the short free time I'm gonna have next week. Today Andrea and I went to help Patrizia to paint the walls of her apartment. It's so tiring but so rewarding.
Well... hope I'll find a little time to post more in the next day. I'm always in stand-by.

Out of order!

Sorry but I'll be out of order at least until the week end... My father is visiting, and I have no spare time at all... just looking forward Saturday!:-)

The 'new' slavery!

Slavery is still here with us... in our hypertechnological era, well-educated society. Is next to us. Your neighbor is a slave, your brother is a slave, your friend may be a slave.... and I'm not talking about slave of alcohol, drug, sex, videogames or such. I'm talking about the use of slaves to get work done!
I am a slave. I work for €5,30 gross per hour, and I have a shift of 10 hours 8-18. Hey! Of course I have a 10 minutes break every 2 hours and half an hour at lunch! But of course if I get up more than twice (excluded lunch break) everybody is very upset... and of course I can choose the days I want to work with a week in advance but... hey I am a slave!
I digit the name of thousands of people everyday, their monthly use of gas, water, and litter... those that are death, those who inherited the house, those who get married and those who lose their shelters... Of course I don't know their histories... but I can imagine.
I can play my mp3 and so I invent their lives! This is the only free thing.
Thanks God none of my living-hours are worth 5.30 euros minus taxes... but I need those money and there I work. And if I don't do this job, somebody else will do the same stinky job for me... Because there will always be a desperate like me in need of those darned 5.30€.
I shouldn't complain because this slavery keeps me employed and because I'm healthy and 'young'. This is not a complain but a statement on what our well-educated, generous and free society is producing. People that may be educated or may improve their education... people with energies and love to give and now slaves of tiredness, slaves of poorness, slaves of our own frustrations.
I understand now why poor people is usually poorly educated too: I come back home with an headache, after spending the whole day at work, probably eating only a sandwich lovingly prepared at home... I breath the other's smell: 20 individuals all packed up in a room with windows overlooking one of the most pollutted streets of Bologna. I arrive at home and the only feeling I have is that of having a shower to clean away all the 'dirty' of the working day. Need something to eat and need sleep. No lust for books anymore... no... "why don't we go to the theatre tonight".. no "what the heck is on tv tonight"...nothing.
But of course our Prime Minister Berlusconi is soooo happy because 1.270.000 new jobs have been created and the unemployment rate dropped from 9.4% to 7.5%... I guess they employed only center-right wing voters.

"One day my soul just opened up!"

Last night I was pretty tired also because I went to bed late, since I had to iron tons of clothes!
By the way, I have lots of books to be read next to my bed and I wanted to give a look at the one Jenny gave me for X-mas and read what I found out!:

"This book is dedicated to Ego,
that part of us that continues to worry,
lives in doubt,
is afraid,
judges other prople,
is afraid to trust,
needs proof,
believes only when it is convenient
fails to follow up, refuses to practice what it preaches,
needs to be rescued,
wants to be a victim,
beats up on "self",
needs to be right all of the time, and
continues to hold on to what does not work.
You are now put on notice that....
YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED!"

.... and except for a couple of things.. I found out I am a total ego-centered!
Need to make some adjustments!
Gotta go to the stinky job!

Standby please!

This is me... lately... "Standby, please!"... I almost can hear the little voice telling this! But I have hope things will change...somehow, sometime!

Same day as...

Same day as yesterday... same things, same shitty stink!

The slight but significative difference was concentrated mainly in the early morning. Faby and Patty picked me up at the bus stop and went together to the stinky job! We had breakfast like in ''the ol' days''. And there's a mix of rage and happiness for this. Rage because we have no love for this job and Happiness because we have each other. But you know what I hate the most? The fact that the happiness doesn't overwhelm me as it should... I'm not taken from the happiness of being loved by those special persons. Of course I'm thankful and consoled by this but I still have that Rage inside of me that makes me say: "It would have been perfect if we were still at the airport!". The neverending fight between the Good and evil.
And for this I hate myself! I don't want the evil inside of me.
I preach forgiveness and positive thoughts, love and joy for everybody but I'm not a good example! And this frustrates me... makes me feel so small and useless... It's all about faith in Holy God... it's all about offering Him our burdens... it's all about knowing everything has a solution. It's about no projects and no desires... it's about recognize that everything is in His hands...It's about receiving His unconditional fatherly Love. And yet, it's so difficult!

Empty day?!

Here's my day... woke up at 6, got ready, had breakfast, drove the iced small car for a couple of kilometers (it's not safe to walk at 7 am in this neighbor because there are no sidewalks and it is still dark!)... the car doesn't de-ice... I tried with a special liquid but inside the warm air is not enough to clear the windows... so I have to drive in a weird way to be sure I don't hit a bicycle! Met Patty at the bus stop, had a light argument on 'the future' (Patty is one of my Spice G.friend and airport ex-collegue... she too is jobless and works with me at the stinky job) we are in a 'dark moment to see the future clearly... then started working at 8. 10 minutes break, then at work..., half an hour to eat lunch and then in the stinky room again. 10 minutes break at 4pm.. then work until 6. To the doctor for Monocolo's antibiotics (I sense he's getting sick again and want to be sure I have the medicines at home), to the farmacy, took the car back home. Got ready to exercise... this has been the highlight of the day! Shower... Arianna rings the bell (Andrea and Guido are attending the condominium meeting... we speak about nothing and actually I get hurted by some of her sayings or not listenings or.. boh... Andrea comes back.. we eat... I'm tired and will go to bed soon... tomorrow... same day. I can't think about searching for a regular 9-5 job... I'm not that kind of person!:-(

New Year's Resolutions

Every new year I always have, within the thousand, the same resolution...: loose weight. I think it's 20 years I wish the same thing for the new year but I'm not so good in keeping it. Actually I keep on gaining weight. Hopefully this year is the good one! Of course it's not easy to keep exercising every day, and stay away from the food...that I love sooo much. But I'm afraid I'll become like my dad, and this is something I really don't want to.
So Andrea gave me this PlayStation2 game for X-mas. I hate PlayStation and Gameboy and those kind of things, I think they're too good in keeping the mind away from books and theatre and movies and art in general... so I always had big arguments with Andrea because he is addicted to videogames and see art in them.
I once bought this PlayStation2 for him with the compromise that he had to play with it only when I'm not at home. Of course I'm always at home, so he never plays. Now in the last issue of FitnessMagazine, gentle concession of my friend Jenny, I saw this new game that helps to achive one's fitness goals and u can choose from different sets of exercises, from martial arts to aerobics and dance ... it's fun and easy and I think that it will help a little to stick with my resolution.
So let's see what I'll be able to do.
Tomorrow I'll start again with the stinky job:-(

Happy 2006

Capodanno 2006 II
Originally uploaded by margiana.

I've been able to connect only today! It has been hectic in those last days!

The 23 we left to Rome and Monocolo came with us... he mewed for half an hour, then he slept.
Once in Rome, we simply started eating. My dad is on diet (he lost 8 kilos but needs to loose some 50 more) so we had a sort of light Christmas Eve dinner (hihihihi...light!!!) but the fattest was on Christmas day. Basically we never stopped eating. And poor Andrea spent 6 days on computers. My brother and 2 of my cousins started an ADSL internet connection and Andrea helped them to do everything... and to adjust all the problems those pc had. Wireless connections, new electric connections and such. And everybody was looking at him behind his shoulders and this is something he really hates:-( This is should be the 'programmer's spell'!
We both were looking forward to go home,(as for me, of course I had a big political argument with my dad right the day after I arrived home).
We headed home on the 29th. We emptied the car, freed Monocolo and then run to IKEA (we received a consistent gift certificate) and we spent it buying the furnitures for the 'living-room', a table for Andrea and his PC and some other little things.
Andrea got his backache again since we had to load on our small Toyota Yaris a big and heavy package. We finally got home and the lack of patience overwhelmed us.
We started assembling the furnitures but we've been awake until 2 am and could finish only the base of it. Next day we helped Patty to move from her apartment (she just bought an apartment) and took our few boxes away from her garage. In the afternoon we kept on assembling the furniture until 4 am. Next day we woke up around 12.30 pm, finished to assemble everything and tidied up things around, that means we had to find all the CDs, DVDs, Playstation games and stuff like this, organize them and put into the shelves. Finally we cleaned the house and arranged the table for the dinner. I started cooking lentils (the tradition says that the more lentils you eat, more money in the new year). Shower and dressed up for the party. The guests arrived with the other courses... the menu was:
Appetizer-salame and cheese, potato chips, tortillas with different sauces, salmon and olives canape, and a bottle of Rossini to drink.
Main course-Lasagne in different shapes and colors!
Fabiola is from the region where the lasagna is characteristic... so she just made wonderful and great-tasting lasagne: 1 lasagna with mushrooms, another with artichokes, the traditional one with ragu and besciamella and last but not least (my favourite) with fontina (a kind of cheese), diced bacon and porcini mushrooms. Oh my... this was really fantastic!
We drunk Vino Nobile di Montepulciano red wine.
The tradition says that on New Years Eve one must eat lentils and 'zampone' (pig's trotter stuffed with seasoned mincemeat) or 'cotechino' (kind of spiced Italian sausage). Just to be sure I cooked both.
To finish Pandoro e Panettone (typical italian X-mas sort of cakes) and dried fruits...
As you can imagine, once the midnight arrived it has been a very difficult task to stand up (and not roll out) and go outside to light up sparklers and kiss best wishes with Arianna and the gang (my next door neighbor)... once back in the house, we could simple sit and play some games. At 2 am everybody was gone and after cleaning dishes and glasses (still no washing machine)Andrea and I were able to look around and feel blessed for what we have... a shelter, friends and our love... we missed you 'overseas friends'!