Febbre!

Fever! Last night my temperature raised enough to make me realize I'm sick! My throat is doing a little better but now I've got a strong cold with this special low voice that should be somehow sexy but the 'babba bia' (meaning mamma mia) pronunciation doesn't help at all.
The good thing is that today I did not go to the stinky job-place and so tomorrow!
The bad thing is that tomorrow I have to pack so many things... and prepare everything for the trip... need to arrange things for Monocolo and be in the mood for Christmas. Need to pick my cell phone from the technical assistance since it suddenly shut down last week. I've never wanted to own a cell phone but from the time I have it I feel lost without. I've got notes and numbers and the memorandum 'book' and the stored sms. So I'm happy that is repaired for only 30€! In those days I used what we call 'scarface' cell phone which misses a couple of keys and its display is partially scratched... moreover has different keys for symbols and spaces and stuff... so I was hell to write a text message!
Cell apart. Tomorrow we'll leave when Andrea will be back home from work (I'm sure not before 6pm) and this means that we'll probably be stucked in the Autostrada for hours before getting to Rome.
Today I had a Skype-chat with Arianna about the party for the New Year's Eve. Doesn't seem to understand my point of view about Claudia, the past and the things that changes... I feel better because I let out my feelings... but I'm not positive the attitudes will change!
I spent the rest of the day on the internet! Surfing around.. loosing the sense of time and watching my Monocat sleeping and snoring under the blanket. I love him when sleeps like this... it's so peaceful!

Angelo

Angelo 2
Originally uploaded by margiana.

People-Persons-Human Beings... what a beautiful creation. All similar in shapes and forms but all different. What a beautiful world we do live in! The bus driver that smashes the door right in front of my face, looking at me with a grin or the girl that smiles at me and asks where I got the hair pin from. The guy that stinks like nothing else in the world and the little boy that is visibly happy due to the music in his headphones. The friend that breaks your heart and the one that heals it. The happy and the sad, the worried and the vain... there's something of somebody in everybody and yet so many combinations of everything end up with some sort of perfect mix. No matter if you are good or bad, beautiful or hugly... each one of us has some specialty.
Today I had the chance to share not more than 1 hour and a half with Ester, an ex-airport-collegue who lives now in Swiss to join a project of Youth for Christ .We did not had a lot of time to talk, we barely explained what's happening, mostly because I have been in a monologue due to my unemployment situation but... there have been connections. There has been a 'sharing' something... and this Something it's Important because it heals the wounded hearts and reminds me that living following our own ideals and beliefs should make us proud of who we choose to be and of what we choose to do.
Need to keep it in mind! Thanks Ester!

Back home: same day... different world!

Back home... still feverish and big swollen eyes but Christmas lights are on... home is warm and dinner's ready... I really have a lot of LOVE around me!

I WANT MY JOB BACK!

Bad day! Went to work at the stinky data entry thing! It's horrible... I feel stupid because I still don't know how to use the programme, and when I look around me for help I can't find it...because the help I need is not in that room. I got out of there and had to rush for the bus... Once on the crowded bus I really wanted to cry! I had to fight against my tears..didn't want to let them fall down: they won! I drove my car home where the vets were already waiting for me. They visited Monocolo and said that his only 'working' eye will not be the 'working' one anymore...the good eye is loosing his clearness, so that he may not be a Monocolo anymore... (Monocolo in italian means 'with one eye only'!)... when the veterinaries left home I just wanted to cry soooo badly... and I did.
I want my job back... I want to be a ramp agent.. I want to work in the open air, breath the polluting fuel, push-back those aircrafts and let those giants leave the earth. .... and at the same time, I know it's silly to act like this and I understand it... but I can't think about anything else today.
Gotta go to buy medicines for Monocolo and then to work to the swimming pool...
I'm sick... got the fever.
This is a bad day!

A walk in the city

Had a walk in the city yesterday...we say 'in centro', with two different friends... In the morning I met Rita and we had breakfast in the cafeteria of the Sala Borsa: the public library that we both love. Lot of chats.. and positive moods. I like Bologna very much... it's not too 'fast' and u can always get some time for u at 'your time'. We talked about her new job and about my stinky job and about some airport-ex-collegues-gossip.
At lunch I met Julie and we ate together 'lots of fiber' in a comfortable place. Then we had a walk to see the things in the shops:-) Both are struggling with a disastrous economical crisis but u know what? we are both very lucky anyway.
Back home I cooked something for the dinner at Patty's home... I cooked stuffed-mushrooms and a salted cake with artichokes... we ate like pigs and had a very good time together... I really think I had a good day! Good vibes are around me:-)

1st day of work!!

I don't understand... I don't understand how can people smell so bad... I really can't understand it! I do understand that some people are not so keen in having too many showers (that is good: u can save water).. or I do know that sometimes teenagers don't have a great relationship with the washing water... but it's only a period, soon they won't be teenagers anymore. I know there are some other whose skin is more perspirant and others that for religious issues or for some special beliefs don't use deodorants... others who simply don't have access to soaps and shampoo... but... how it is possible for a guy on his past 20ies to smell so bad? His breath is horrible for the smoke and the not-washing-his-teeth thing and the rest is unbelievably stinking... so now... today it was my first day at this stupid-silly-low-paid-data-entry-job... and this guy, a sort of supervisor explained me everything and showed me how to control the bills and other things.. that means that his closiness was too close and that I was almost going to throw up right on the desk I was working! Moreover... if I think that I will spend there a lot of hours in the next days, it simply gross me out... bleaaaahhhhh
So my friend...the lessons for today is... never underestimate the power of a bad smell:-)
Take care of the planet, don't misuse water but please, keep the bad smell under control!!!
As for the rest I won't tell you how I felt after 8 hours of a new computer program... right in front of the screen!!!

Good Mood

...I'm in a good mood! Yes, you're reading it right:I'm in a good mood!
It's almost unbelievable.. but I feel good.
Everyday more I'm getting signs of the greatness of our Savior... and now I think it's time to make those signs fruitful..
A friend is pregnant and is now a unmarried-mother, and even if this baby was not planned, she's doing all her best to give him/her a 'perfect' life... it's going to be difficult but... she will sort things out!
The unionist said that the excess employees won't be laid at home...so that now 3 of my 'Spice-Girl friend' won't became jobless as the other 2 (Patty and I)... and that means that we still have a little chance to support each other.
Another friend found the perfect job... the salary is not enough for her needs but it's a part-time job and she's optimistic she'll find some other job to improve the salary... and she'll be happy with it.
Another friend simply thanked me.
As Kathy says I don't have to plan things and need to give my burdens to God, and his will will be done... and.. as my friend Jenny says, the more positive I think the better it will be. Of course there are days in which I don't feel right but today I feel good... and the more good I feel the better it is:-)

My B-day....33rd

Regali 33rd b-day2
Originally uploaded by margiana.

Spent the morning at the employment office to apply for the unemployment benefit. I had to wait for almost an hour to produce a document where I had to say that I'm jobless (silly:-). In the meantime I gave a look to the job offers... the first one was:'Assistant to the Morgue room'. So now... nothing to object to the Morgue room assistant but of course it's not really what I'm looking for:-(
When we came out of this place the mood was not great... being there with all the other 'desperate' jobless and looking at a uncertain future is a little scary but... it was my b-day and nothing had to ruin it.
Andrea and I had lunch in an hip bar (you don't ate enough and pay too much)but at least was a vey nice place... then we went to IKEA (for a cappuccino) and at night we went to Patty's for dinner... it has been a sort of surprise dinner but most of the people that had to be there did not showed off: Fabiola was stucked in Bilbao... her flight was 5 hours delayed and Betta had another problem... Andrea A. was sick.. so at the end there was Patty, Matteo, Silvia, Antonio and Andrea and I... everything was perfect and the cake was great!

Searching for a job...found handmade stools

This morning I went with my friend Rita in the city center with the plan of systematically find a job...we met at the public library Sala Borsa, right in Piazza del Nettuno, we had a cappuccino and planned to go to some Recruitment Agencies to bring our résumées and see what it happens... and you know what?... it is really depressing... I felt like a piece of meat in the supermarket, and that is all! There's no interest in the person... but only in the quantity of "labels" you earned during your past job experiences... and I may be naive in this but no wonder if the majority of people is not satisfied with their jobs!
There is not really a match between demand and offer... but simply a commitment between which job is less horrible than the other. I may sound depress... but trust me... better not be unemployed after you had the job you like....
I also felt guilty to refuse a part-time telemarketing job (sounds like it's the only job available on the market) where I had to sell commercial spaces on the yellow pages! I CAN'T SELL COMMERCIAL SPACES... I'm not going to make this job SIMPLY BECAUSE I'M NOT A GOOD SELLER!!! and the fact that I'm good in being with people and outspoken doesn't mean I'm a good seller... I can fake but it won't last... it's biological!
Does anybody know that there are persons that love to sell and persons that don't?
I refused the job telling the girl that I'll be happy to leave this employment to somebody who'll be more motivated to do it..."more motivated = better job" isn't it so?
and I know there may be the perfect job for me and that it will soon display right in front of me but... in the meantime you get plenty of shit!

Passing on... other than that I stopped at the airport because a guy who works there had to give me a gift... I used to work with this man a lot when I was at the airport. He is one of those guy who help people with wheelchairs to get from the terminal to the aircraft or the one who brings the AVIH (alive animals in hold) dogs and cats under the aircraft so to be loaded in the holds and other helpful jobs.
He came to know that Andrea and I bought an house and wanted to give us a 'welcome gift'... even if it's already a year we're in.
Enzo (his name) is very gentle and is one of those people that takes a long time to express a simple thought and speaks allusively so to gain a sort of philosopher fame in his environment... He says that buying an house is a very important thing and that is the basis for bigger projects and that even if you own only the roof over your head you are half way to happiness and such....( I did not underlined the fact that I won't own my house before 29 years and that the fact that I bought an house is now a pain in the ass when the loan bill
arrives :-))..well he handmade from recycled wood those 2 stools... and I find it so nice that somebody who I'm only in a ex-sort-of-collegue-relationship made with his hands something that will be in my house!!! (and they're made out of recycled wood!!!)... so I finally got home with a smile on my face... still believing in PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP as the base for an healthy spirit.
Monocolo is recovering from his cold and the house is warm... want to go back in my slippers, read a little, listen to Allie McBeal Original Soundtrack and drink my favourite Oregon Chai Tea in my NYC mug!

I Want to be a computer geek!

Since I'm jobless at the moment.... I have plenty of time to surf the internet. Of course I keep me busy with other things, but in days like this when outside is sooooo cold and the fog covers everything, I prefer stay at home surfing this weird world that is internet....
So my next 'mission' is to share with you my friends some thoughts, moments, ideas and pictures that remain otherwise un-shared making them nonsense... so now we'll have more nonsense shared:-) I think that can be an aim!

Thanksgiving and the Snowman

Yesterday we attended a Thanksgiving dinner here in Italy. An ex collegue of mine whose wife is American invited us and a bunch of friend to share the meaning of Thanksgiving... we ate a lot... (see the table...)all the traditional recipes as turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin and apple pie.... the dinner turned out to be a beautiful time for sharing....
We really appreciated the invitation and we came out of their 'warm' home with some more things to be thankful for...

This morning we woke up and there was a beautiful sun... shining over the snow that falled yesterday... so we decided to 'create' our Snowman... that we called Mike... and we stayed outside sunbathing for a couple of hours... Beautiful Sun....

Slowly recovering

OK... so now I think it's time to recover.... I'll be writing in english sometimes so that my foreigner friends can have a look and stick their noses in my daily routine...
So yesterday I went to the airport and had to take my stuff out of my locker and it was nothing fun.... I saw my collegues and everything else... and when I got out of it I was feeling really very sad.
But life goes on and I have to really start reacting. I came backhome and decided to cook a cake called 'castagnaccio': it's easy, not too sweet and really great for the season....Castagnaccio not exactly this recipe but similar....
Then Fabiola came to visit, she came out of a union meeting where they discussed about the employees excess and she was pretty much worried.
She's really upset since she has the loan to pay and is on her own... so to cover the sadness we just ate the castagnaccio and drink herbal infusion.

This morning the washing-machine-guy came to visit my washing machine.... and guess what?... it's ok. So I only had to pay the 30 € for the guy. But I'm happy I thought I had to pay over 100€.
So now we'll see for tomorrow since the heater-boiler-guy will come for the annual tests...
How is it possible that everyday we have to take hand on the pocket?

By the way... the money are not all... this is why I have to change perspective in looking at things... So now I'm waiting for an answer from Ikea and hopefully it will be before Christmas.... meanwhile I'll keep working in the swimming-pool.

Need to keep active... but today is snowing (I don't like the snow) and can't go out walking... need to home execise.

OK Gotta go now.... not said much but I'll try to bring out more interesting topics next.

Giro in Centro

Per oggi un bel giro in centro.... CioccoShow, Piazza Santo Stefano e un buonissimo Cappuccino alla vaniglia.... poi Mel Bookstore.... divertente!
Comincia a fare freddo.

Tempo grigio

Tempo grigio..... umore nero.... nero come negazione di tutti i colori non come vero e proprio colore.... immobilità .
Sì effettivamente non c'è nulla da raccontare per oggi. ... speriamo di tornare presto:-)

L'essenziale è invisibile agli occhi

Questo che io vedo non è che la scorza. Il più importante è invisibile...Ecco ciò che mi commuove di più in questo piccolo principe addormentato: è la sua fedeltà a un fiore, è l'immagine di una rosa che risplende in lui come la fiamma di una lampada, anche quando dorme...